You Can Break the Cycle
You know you want to do things differently.
So why do you keep finding yourself doing the same things?
Maybe you’ve done the therapy. Read the books. Had the realisations. You understand where some of your patterns come from, but somehow, knowing isn’t always enough to change them.
Maybe you keep people-pleasing when you promised yourself you wouldn’t.
You struggle to say no without feeling guilty.
You find yourself reacting in ways that don’t feel like you.
You keep choosing the same kinds of relationships.
Or perhaps becoming a parent has brought parts of yourself to the surface that you thought you’d already dealt with.
And underneath it all, there’s a feeling you can’t quite shake: Why am I still like this?
The truth is, many of the ways we move through the world were learned long before we consciously chose them. They helped us belong. Stay connected. Feel safe. Get our needs met. Protect ourselves. And when those ways of being become deeply woven into us, changing them can feel like more than changing a behaviour. It can feel like changing who you are.
This is where we begin.
Together, we look beneath the pattern, not to blame your past or endlessly analyse what happened, but to understand why you became the way you became. Because when you can meet those parts of yourself with understanding, something begins to shift. You don't have to become someone else. You get to become more fully yourself.
The Offer
Shadow Integration is the work I offer. It’s a space for meeting the parts of you that are often just out of reach of awareness, the parts that learned to adapt, to protect, to hold things together, or to disappear in order to stay safe in relationship. A lot of people come to this work having already done a lot of thinking about themselves. They can often describe their patterns clearly. They understand where things come from. And still, something in the pattern remains unchanged.
My own experience of this mirrored that. There was a time when I could understand the patterns I was playing out, but I was still living it. What shifted things wasn’t letting go of understanding, but going deeper into experience itself, working with what was happening beneath thought, in the body and in the more unconscious layers where these patterns actually live.
That is what Shadow Integration is for. It doesn’t bypass insight, but it also doesn’t stop there. It works with the full picture, what you know, and what you can feel, even when you don’t yet have language for it. I’m especially interested in how what we carry is shaped by family systems and early relationships, and how those patterns can continue to move through us long after the original context has changed. Many of the things people struggle with now once made perfect sense in a different time and place.
This work tends to resonate with people who are ready to meet those patterns more directly, rather than just understand them from a distance. Sessions are available 1:1 and I also offer groups specifically for parents to support them to break the cycle. I currently offer face-to-face sessions in Frome (soon to be in Bristol), as well as online sessions for clients everywhere. If you’re ready to explore your inner world and begin transforming the patterns holding you back, book a free discovery call today.
"Frankie is just one of those natural space holders for people to heal their wounds."
- Aimee
Ways to Work With Me
A 5-hour immersive session that gives space for us to move beyond conversation into a deeper exploration of the patterns you are carrying and the cycles you may be ready to shift. These sessions focus on how unconscious family dynamics and internal roles continue to shape the way you relate, respond, and experience yourself in daily life. Using reflection, movement, symbols, and dialogue, we work with the parts of you that hold these patterns and the parts that learned to adapt in order to stay connected or safe. This extended space allows time to move beyond insight alone and into what is held more deeply in the body and nervous system, so that change has space to land in a more real and lasting way.
A 1-hour online or in-person coaching session focused on bringing awareness to the patterns that are currently showing up in your day-to-day life. This work is reflective and forward-focused, helping you understand the unconscious family dynamics and internal roles that may still be shaping your thoughts, emotions, and relationships. Together we look at what is playing out in real time and what is keeping certain cycles in place, while also exploring how you might begin to respond differently. It is a space for clarity, perspective, and small but meaningful shifts that support you in moving out of repetition and into more conscious choice.
Groups
Small group spaces for parents who want to understand and begin shifting the unconscious family patterns that can be activated through parenting and passed on through generations. These groups offer a slower, more reflective environment to explore how your own upbringing and internalised roles may be shaping your responses to your child, especially in moments that feel intense or familiar. It is not about parenting perfectly, but about becoming more aware of the cycles that are being lived out in real time and finding new ways to meet both yourself and your child within them. Held in a supportive group setting, these spaces create room for shared understanding, reflection, and gentle change.
"All of me felt honoured and grateful to Frankie. I think she is an incredible therapist, full of integrity, very insightful and intuitive in how she works, a safe pair of hands who I feel has walked the walk."
- Natasha
Free Guide: Shadow Work for Conscious Parenthood
Becoming a parent can bring up parts of ourselves we never knew were there. This guide explores how the patterns, beliefs and emotional responses we carry can influence the way we relate to our children, and how developing greater self-awareness can create more choice, connection and compassion in parenting. Through exploring shadow work, you’ll be invited to understand the hidden parts of yourself, meet them with curiosity, and consider what you want to carry forward - and what you want to transform - for the next generation.
We all carry parts of ourselves that were formed in response to the environments we grew up in. These parts were not created because something is wrong with us, but because at some point they helped us survive, adapt, or stay connected to the people around us. Over time, they can become so familiar that we no longer notice them as adaptations, but instead experience them as personality, reaction, or identity.
These patterns don’t only live in our thoughts. They show up in how we relate, how we respond under stress, and how we move through close relationships. And even when we can understand them clearly, they can still continue to run in the background of our lives.
This is where deeper work becomes important. Rather than only working at the level of insight or understanding, we begin to bring awareness to what is held beneath it, the protective responses, emotional patterns, and early experiences that still shape how we are in the present. As these parts are met with more awareness and care, something begins to soften and reorganise in a more embodied way.
This work can feel especially meaningful when you are noticing repeating patterns in relationships, navigating parenting, preparing to become a parent, or trying to understand the impact of a family system that still lives within you in some way. As unconscious patterns come into awareness, there is often more space to respond differently, relate more consciously, and feel more connected to yourself and others.
